Ottawa's Festival of Ideas Since 1997

Till Death Do Us Part?

Once upon a time not so long ago in the Kingdom of Ought-to-another-way lived a girl, but not just any girl a true warrior. Her name was Tiara she was strong, smart, loyal, beautiful and very independent yet she was lonely, lost, and full of self doubt. She was a drifter a lone wolf, not fitting in anywhere yet somehow fitting in everywhere. She had been on many long journeys, lived in many many kingdoms. She was lucky when she found a kind older women in the Village of VA to take her into her tiny hut. This would become her go-to safe zone, her secret hideaway. A safe place was definitely what she was going to need.

After what seemed like a Quest failed horribly Tiara became full of regret, shame and guilt she started hanging around Gerard an Evil Old Troll. He wasn’t much but was someone to be around once and awhile. Before she knew it she was isolated from her true friends like Charlie and family, which quickly lead her back to a life of crime, hustle and escapism. Her Daily Quest became selling Purple flowers and obtaining goods needed in the Village of Rocky Pitt. She would spend her days hanging out in spaces where people who enjoy purple flowers, mushrooms and MANY other things come together to buy, sell, trade and use. Every night she would return to the tiny hut in VA alone and bored. She entertained herself smoking both purple flowers and mushrooms, this was becoming an activity that she was doing more and more everyday.
The Evil Old Troll named Gerard had the girl on lockdown. He could care less about her.... He didn't want her, but he didn't want anyone else to have her either. He would leave her alone for days at a time, ignoring all her messages, then pop up back up out of the blue full of demands, and to top it off there was zero intimacy. Tiara was unhappy unmotivated and feeling stuck. What would she do next??

Late one night while Tiara was having a relaxing time alone, Gerard showed up with a stranger. His name was C-dogg he was a well known mushroom seller in the Village of VA. He was interested in buying some purple flowers and Tiara was the girl who specialty was just that. As he walked in the tiny hut she looked up, she laid eyes on him, and immediately her heart started rac- ing, she became nervous and was speechless. She started to feel ways she had never felt before. As C-dogg, Gerard and Tiara sat around talking and trading items, C-dogg leaned back looked Tiara in her pretty brown eyes and smiled. At that moment she knew what her next Quest would be ...Get rid of the Evil Old Troll and get close to C-dogg. After C-dogg left that night he was all she could think about. His blue eyes, his long hair and that smile that melted her heart were stuck in her head, consuming her head space and not allowing her to sleep.
When morning came having little sleep she left to the Village of Rocky Pitt where she would go everyday to sell or trade her purple flowers. Today she spent 8 hours walking around the village, seeing her regular customers and sometimes coming across someone new. She couldn’t stop thinking about C-dogg and hoped she would run into him, she knew that was unlikely as he hung out in a different village. After a long day her quest was finished she has everything she needed and headed back to her hideaway.

That evening C-dogg showed up at the hut Tiara was so happy. They spent 3 days together C-dogg on the couch and Tiara in her bed they talked for hours and hours really getting to know each other. Not once did the Evil Old Troll make an appearance at the hut, he didn't send any messages or make any attempts to contact Tiara. She didnt care she was done with him waiting for him to come to the door so she could give him his belongings and rid herself of him once and for all. The only thing Tiara wants is to be with C-dogg and at this point she is totally in love with him, she wants so badly to tell him but can’t because technically she belongs to Gerard. After a long night of smoking purple flowers and mushrooms C-dogg asked Tiara “when am I going to be able to lay down in that bed.” Quest Complete she knew that he felt the same way about her that she did about him. She quickly responded “Right Now!!.” That night they would sleep together and officially start their journey through life together, and what a rollercoaster ride it would be.
The next morning they left the hut together, but headed in different directions to fulfill their daily quests:

1) Sell their products and obtain the goods they need
2) Be Safe always
3) Restock supply and ALWAYS return to hut with re-up and goods


This would become their daily routine after a week past by the Evil Old troll showed up. Tiara knew strongly what she wanted, his belongings were already at the door. She handed him his things, said goodbye and closed the door and that horrible chapter of her life.

One cold rainy day C-dogg left early in the morning to go and complete his daily quest, this time he doesn't return. Tiara knows something bad has happened, he always comes back, where he could be? Tiara turns frantic, she is scared and feeling helpless. She packs a small bag and heads out to retrace his steps, she needs to know what has happened to C-dogg, she needs to find him. It didn't take her very long to find out that he had been arrested by the kingdom guard and taken to the jail. Her heart sank, reality sets in and Tiara is all alone once again.

This horrible turn of events has her uncontrollably sad and can’t bring herself to do any- thing except escape from the world using mind altering substances. That is exactly what she did, she hung around different spots in the Rocky Pitt using purple flowers and mushrooms day and night, not sleeping, not eating falling deeper and deeper into darkness. On a sunny day mid week Tiara was hanging out around the hut in VA, bored and with nothing to do she decides to consume some pur- ple flowers. What happened next she will never really know...she stopped breathing, fell back onto the bed... she was poisoned... she was dead. Miracles do happen and one happened that day.Tiara’s true friend Charlie a Mysterious and Magical Amazonian women stopped by the hut to check on her. When Charlie saw Tiara’s lifeless body laying there she quickly went to work trying to reverse what- ever magic had been placed on her. Charlie came from a long line of miracle workers, for generations they have used many different forms of magic to help those around them. Tiara sat up, took a deep deep breath and began to ask questions about what had happened. Charlie is so happy Tiara is alive but she is fed up with her life choices, the things she is doing are hurting Charlie. “Listen Tiara you need help, I don’t want to lose you. Please Journey to the Kingdom of Kongly where you can go on a spiritual quest and find yourself. I will bring you to the gates.”


Tiara quickly accepts her true friends offer and they begin the journey to the Kingdom of Kongly so she can begin her spiritual quest. When they arrived at the gates to Kongly, Charlie gave her a hug and told Tiara she was proud of her. Tiara didn't want to stay but she knew if she wanted to have a future with Charlie and C-dogg she needed some help to make changes. She spent a week there learning who she really was and what she wanted out of life. She did some deep soul searching, and wound healing. She learned so much during her time there and was definitely more self aware. When Charlie returned for her, Tiara was feeling rejuvenated, motivated and ready to take on the world. As Charlie and Tiara head back to Ought-to-be-another-way Tiara is excited to get back and start living her new life. She was quickly able to get some hourly waged jobs with Charlie. Tiara loved this work because it allowed her to share things she learned on her many journeys with people in the village struggling with similar issues. Tiara received word that in just a short couple weeks C-dogg would be released, this news was both exciting and motivating. She found a cute little hut on the westside of Ought-to-be-another-way, it was perfect for her and C-dogg. Now all she needed to do was wait for C-dogg to come home and be by her side, she was ready... she couldn’t wait to hold him again.

Today was the day she had been waiting for! and what a happy day it would be! C-dogg was being released from the jail. Tiara was so nervous she changed her hair and outfit 3 times before she was happy with how she looked. She made the trip to the big steel gates sat outside, and she wait ed and waited and waited until finally she looked up and here he came. He looked better then she remembered, she hugged and kissed him, she never wanted to let him go and she never would. She spent the day beside him with a huge smile on her face, she finally felt complete she had exactly what she wanted. She hoped that this would be her... Till Death Do Us Part!